On Monday, I had my first mammogram in 18 months. Once my temperature was checked, I signed the necessary paperwork, and then I went over to the registration area. I noticed while going through the process of registering that the paperwork from my surgeon ordering my mammogram, said to do an ultrasound “if medically necessary.” I prayed that I would not need an ultrasound because I knew that meant that they saw something during the mammogram and would need to take a closer look.
The breast center that I go to, which is in the same building as my surgeon and oncologist, takes terrific care of me. I barely waited for 5 minutes before the nurse came to get me to take me to the back so I could change into a gown. I love the gowns there, they are pre-heated, and so are the blankets! It’s the little things I guess, anything to feel more comfortable when you are waiting to go in to have your breasts smashed in a machine. I was incredibly nervous because I couldn’t help but think about the last time I had a mammogram; when the results said that I had a mass that was “highly suspicious of malignancy.”
When I went back for the mammogram, the first task we needed to take care of was to go over everything I had been through concerning my breast cancer and treatment. It was hard to recount everything from the number of treatments to how many surgeries I have had, what type of surgery it was, and when everything occurred. It was hard to go through the details, not because I couldn’t remember them but because I could, and it was just so much to go through in a short period of time. Even now, when I start thinking about everything that has happened, I get depressed, and sometimes I am brought to tears. I am lucky to be here, and I know that, but that fact doesn’t take away the memories and pain of every blood draw, surgery, and treatment that I have endured.
I didn’t realize how different the process of a mammogram would be with breast implants, so it was a shock to go through what seemed like twice as much imaging. First, I had a regular mammogram, and the standard trays were used with the usual amount of images being taken. But since I have breast implants, I had to have extra imaging done with my implants being pushed up and out of the way. I won’t lie, it was painful to have the edge of the metal platform jam into the scars under my breasts, but it was necessary to be in that position to move my implants out of the way. Once we had finished the mammogram, the tech had me go back to the waiting room while the doctor looked over the images. I waited for a few minutes, and when I saw the tech come back, I was hoping that it was time to leave, but no, the doctor asked for a few more images. So we went back to the mammogram room, and she took two more images, and then sent me back to the waiting room.
I waited for a few more minutes, and then a different and very pregnant tech came to get me. I noticed right away that she was taking me into the ultrasound room, and I immediately got upset. She told me not to worry and that this was normal, but I knew better. She only imaged my right breast, the side where I did not have breast cancer. Once she was finished getting more images, she took me back to the waiting room while the doctor took a look at the ultrasound images. After a few minutes, the mammogram tech came to take me back to the mammogram room for one last mammogram image of my right breast. Now my anxiety is starting to kick into high gear! “What did they find? Do I have cancer in my right breast now? I can’t go through everything again!” My mind was racing, and I wasn’t going to calm down until I knew what was going on. Still, at the same time, I truly appreciated that they were taking their time to make sure that they were able to see and identify what was showing up in the images and give my surgeon and me accurate information.
This time instead of taking me back to the waiting room, the tech had me wait in the mammogram room while the doctor took a look at the last image. She said that I might have to go back to the ultrasound room with the doctor so she could pinpoint the area that was causing concern. Sure enough, I went back into the ultrasound room, and the tech did some measuring and marked an area with a pen for the doctor. The doctor came in and took a few extra images, looked at everything carefully, and then told me that I have some tiny cysts in my right breast, but they are benign, there is no sign of cancer!