I Found A Lump

A few days ago, on Tuesday, I found a lump on the left side of my neck at the base right where my neck curves into my shoulder; the same side of my body where my breast cancer was, and the same side where I had all of the terrible pain in my head. I was reading through my emails, playing with my necklace as I often do, and my fingers felt something odd. I took off my necklace to investigate further, and it felt exactly like the tumor I found in my breast a little over three years ago, as this one is a small round bump with a lump next to it.

It should be no surprise that I went into full panic mode. I thought about what to do next and called my husband. I told him about what I found and that I thought about calling my oncologist, but I knew he would want imaging done. I then remembered that my surgeon has a mobile ultrasound machine at his office, so it made sense to see him first and have him do an ultrasound. My husband agreed with my decision, so I called my surgeon’s office to see if I could get an appointment the following day, yesterday, which is an office day for him to see patients. Luckily, I was able to get an afternoon appointment to see him and have the ultrasound done.

During my appointment, he first took a look with the ultrasound at the lump I described to him, then he looked at the lymph nodes under my left arm. He couldn’t find anything unusual under my arm, and he said that he was not sure what the lump was on my neck, other than a mass. He asked me if I had contacted my oncologist yet, and I explained that I hadn’t called him because I knew he would want imaging, so I wanted to see him, my surgeon, first for the ultrasound. Then he asked if I wanted to do a PET scan or a biopsy first as we need to find out what we are dealing with this time. I asked his opinion and told him that I trust his judgment, which I do without question, and we agreed that a biopsy should be done first, and then if it comes back positive, we will do a PET scan to see if I have any other tumors in my body. So early in the morning on Friday, I will go back to his office, and he will do a needle biopsy. He gave me the option of being asleep during the biopsy or using the needle with a local, and I chose the needle because I didn’t see the need to be put to sleep for a biopsy after having five surgeries in twenty-two months.

Quite honestly, I am scared. I would go into more about my fear, but it touches on what I am not ready to share yet. The only comfort I have right now is that I already know the possible next steps, no surprises this time, which of course is both good and bad.

I will update as soon as I have my biopsy results which should be some time between late Friday and Monday.

Christmas 2020

Sorry, I know it’s been a while since I have written a blog entry. I have had a few readers asking me if I am OK in the meantime, and I am doing OK; it’s been tough for me lately, but I am hanging in there. I don’t want to go into detail yet; I am not ready, but I will write about it soon as it is important to me to be completely honest about what I am going through.

What can I say? The holidays proved to be more difficult than I had anticipated, so much so that I asked my husband if we could leave town. I couldn’t bear to spend another Christmas away from my Dad, my brother, sister-in-law, niece, and my cousin and his wife. With my Dad turning 90 years old this month and having had some recent medical procedures done, it was best to cancel Christmas. I would never forgive myself if I were the cause of my Dad contracting Covid-19, so I understood the decision; there was no choice.

We decided at the last minute, about a month out, to make plans to go to Jamaica for Christmas. We were excited to get everything booked and planned for our trip, but unfortunately, less than two weeks before departing, we were informed that the resort we wanted to go to was not going to reopen in time for our trip.

We ended up going to Turks & Caicos, which was a great decision as we have always wanted to go there but hadn’t had the chance to go yet. I will be honest, I did cry on Christmas day, and I was a little pissy. Even though I was in a beautiful place, I missed my family and needed to vent a bit and move on with the rest of my trip.

Here are a few pictures from our trip; I will post again over the weekend to update you about the check-up appointment I had with my oncologist last Thursday.

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