Thoughts

Life

June 7th, 2019

Mood: Hopeful 😏

So true, but now I realize this more than ever….I told Matt tonight that it is time to make a list of the places we want to travel to, places we have never been; because we don’t know what the future will hold and I want to see and do as much as I can in the coming years.

Thoughts

Random Thought

May 25th, 2019

Random thought of the day…it is really hard to drink 1/2 of my body weight, in ounces mostly water, every day! It is an essential task while going through chemo so I am figuring it out. My Fitbit app is helping me keep track so that has been awesome!

I am still feeling good today so that is a huge plus! Have a great holiday weekend everyone! 💕

Experiences

Next Steps

May 17th, 2019

Mood: Anxious 😏

Quick update…I saw my surgeon on Wednesday and he said that everything looks great concerning my surgery site. We scheduled the surgery to install my port for chemo which will be done today, Friday. It is a quick 30 minute surgery and it sounds like it is very routine, so I am not having as much anxiety about it as I did with the first surgery, which was much longer and far more difficult.

I had an Echocardiogram on Thursday and the results will be back either tomorrow or Monday. I am not expecting anything out of the ordinary in the results. The tech said that when I held my breath for her the chambers in my heart were opening big and strong and closing normally. It was pretty cool to see and hear my heart beating on the screen.

Thoughts

Health Directive

May 14th, 2019

Mood: Exhausted 😩

Another night of thinking about things….

I am thinking that it would be smart to call the hospital tomorrow and ask about a health directive, whatever is required in GA. I would ask my Dad but I don’t want to scare him with the fact that I am thinking about it.

After really talking to Matt, I understand that he has had the same thoughts about the cancer killing me, as I have. It could come back at any time or there could be cells as my oncologist explained that are too small to detect. I am starting chemo soon and I have a positive outlook but I can’t help but notice that nothing has gone as planned since all of this started.

I want to take steps now, if I can, to make things easier for Matt should something happen to me or if I end up in the hospital.

Heavy stuff, but things I need to think about if not act on some time soon.

Experiences

Goodies

May 8th, 2019

Mood: Hopeful 😌

Matt & I went to my appointment for “chemo teaching” at my oncologists office today.

Our first stop was meeting with a nurse at my oncologists office. We went over some information concerning my chemo treatment and she gave Matt & I a lot of good information about what drugs I can take along with what will be prescribed to help me be more comfortable during my 20 weeks of treatment. She also talked to me about eating before treatment and diet/exercise after each treatment.

Our next stop was in the financial office to discuss what drugs are covered and which ones are not. I was expecting some big numbers but not quite what she told us. She is seeing what she can do and I am getting some additional information from the hospital but it looks like my chemo treatment could cost us as much as $45k, yes you did read that right….sigh… Before we left her office she gave us a bag of goodies, all things to help with my transition from now to going through chemo….soft slipper socks, lots of lip balms and various natural products for me to use like soap and deodorant. I am very impressed with the quality of the items and it was a completely unexpected gift.

Once we were done in the financial office we went to the Center for Cancer Care which is a resource office in the same building where the Breast Center is along with my oncologist and surgeon. We met with the on-site rep for the American Cancer Society and she gave us a packet of information along with another bag of goodies that included a blanket, colored pencils, a small pencil sharpener and a cool spiral book that has a calendar, lots of inspirational messages and a few pictures to color. She even had wigs in her office but I have already purchased a few. As we were leaving we checked the basket of knit hats in the waiting area that has always been empty when I have been there before, but they had about 6 of them this time. The knit hats are made by members of a local church and it was really touching to be able to pick one out to bring home.

Other than the financial part, it was a good visit that just reconfirmed with me that Gwinnett Medical Center, my doctors and their staff all care about my journey and making sure that I get through this. There are so many little things that they do that are so huge to me and I appreciate it so much!

Experiences

Drains & Chemo Plan

May 3rd, 2019

Mood: Normal 😌

Today was a good day….I went to my surgeons office and had the 2nd drain and stitches removed….yay!! I am healing well and I will have another follow up appointment soon. I will also go back to my surgeon to have him put my port in for chemo.

I also went to see my oncologist and he gave me my plan for chemo. I will start chemo on May 23rd, the day after our 15th wedding anniversary. I will have 2 drugs for 4 treatments every other week for 2 months and then 1 drug for 12 treatments once a week for 12 weeks. My last treatment will be on October 3rd, with my reconstruction surgery sometime soon after that.

So why so much chemo?? Because the 18 lymph nodes that were removed during my surgery were all cancer, so there is a concern that I most likely do have tiny microscopic cancer cells in other locations in my body that are too small to show up on an ultrasound. It is not worth taking the chance to leave anything behind so I am going to have the most aggressive treatment and I am fine with that….I trust my doctors to get me past this.

My oncologist said that I shouldn’t have any problems with this treatment plan other than not feeling well at the beginning for several days after, but it is a double dose of drugs and that is why I will only go in every other week for that portion of treatment. He also said that the anti-nausea meds have come a long way in the last few years so my discomfort should be minimal especially with them giving me a dose of them when I go in for treatment as well as having a prescription at home.

At some point during my chemo treatment I will meet with my radiologist to go over the plan for my radiation treatment which will be after my reconstruction surgery.

Whew…..still a long road that could even keep us in GA for Christmas but we are all excited about the plan and Matt and I are very pleased with my doctors.

Experiences

Surgery Follow-up

April 29th, 2019

Mood: Frustrated 😟

Today I went for my follow up appointment with my surgeon. He had good news and bad news….the good news is that he got all of the cancer out and my margins are clean. My surgery site is healing well and my drains will be taken out on Friday. The bad news is that all of the “suspicious” lymph nodes that he went ahead and removed during my surgery, all 18 of them, tested positive for cancer. So, I am now at Stage 3 due to the amount of cancer that was removed and I will need to have an “aggressive” chemo treatment plan. I don’t know exactly what he meant by that, but I will find out when I meet with my oncologist on Friday.

My surgeon is amazing…..after he gave me the bad news he continued to remind me that I am young, healthy and that my margins are clean, all very positive and important parts of my journey. He also made sure to remind me that once the chemo is over I will have my reconstructive surgery and he will “make my chest beautiful” again….that is his specialty and why he is the ideal breast cancer surgeon. 😁

Experiences

Rough Day

April 27th, 2019

Mood: Exhausted 😴

Today was a bit rough. I have been nauseous on and off. I have been a little irritable, mainly because I am tired of the bandages and drains. Matt has been wonderful with emptying my drains and recording the amount of icky, that’s a medical term you know…🤣, that has collected so we can give that information to my surgeon on Monday. I am barely collecting anything in the drains now, so I am hoping my bandages will get much smaller and the drains will be removed when we see him.

I am still going to sleep at random times even though I have substantially reduced the amount of painkillers I am taking. Besides a few moments of dozing off, today I took a long nap, almost 2 hours and I was shocked when I woke up at almost 9pm.

I have received a few messages from people that want me to call them back. Please give me time as I am resting and sleeping as much as I can and a phone conversation can wear me out. I am updating on here as I can….Love you all! 💕