August 7th, 2019
Mood: Anxious 😟
My thoughts can be overwhelming at times….
Work is an excellent distraction. I am thankful every day that I work from home and that I still have my job. I love my job and in many ways it is helping me “keep it together” from day to day.
I try my best to have as many normal days as possible but it isn’t easy because I know that my body is fighting hard and that I am sick with cancer. Most days I try to forget that I have another treatment coming up, that I am sick, that I am fighting cancer. To most I look like I am brave and dealing with all of this well but I am not as brave as you think.
I have cancer….those 3 words still make me cry when I say them outloud or even think them. I still cry when I look in the mirror and see that all of my hair is gone, that my left breast is deformed. I cry often, if that makes me weak then so be it…I am doing the best I can.
This is a terrible and difficult journey, one that I didn’t ask for, one that isn’t in my family history and one that will change my life forever…..